YOUR DAILY DYSTOPIA | 2017.06.16

Fred Chong Rutherford
3 min readJun 16, 2017

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Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп did his usual round of complaining about the unfairness of the world on Friday on, you guessed it, Twitter! He wrote, “I am being investigated for firing the FBI Director by the man who told me to fire the FBI Director! Witch Hunt” on the popular social media platform.

There had been speculation that Трамп was under investigation, but thankfully, Dear Leader Трамп put those rumors to bed by fully confirming it.

According to White House sources, Трамп is later planning to Tweet that …

  • He knows what he’s doing
  • He no longer sexually assaults women
  • He’s not a grifter conman who stole money from students via his ill-fated Трамп University scam

Sources say that any time someone tells Трамп that people tend to believe the opposite of what he says, he takes away their ice cream so they’ve all stopped trying.

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Speaking of passing the buck, popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп apparently is unable to make his own decisions. It seems that, at least today, the only reason Трамп fired FBI Director James Comey was because he was told to by Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein.

Of course, in an interview with NBC’s Lester Holt on May 11, Трамп said he was “going to fire [Comey] regardless of recommendation” from Rosenstein and Sessions. Трамп emphasized that, “What I did is I was going to fire Comey. My decision,” a day after the White House had said the president fired Comey based on a recommendation from Rosenstein.

White House aides working on a legal defense for Трамп have apparently set fire to their previous defense, and are starting over again from scratch.

It’s unclear at this time if Трамп will also take away their ice-cream.

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Popular vote loser and aspiring dictator Donald Трамп got some good news today, when conservative polling firm Rasmussen Poll reported that the President had hit a 50% approval rating. According to the same poll, 50% of people disapprove of Трамп.

The previous approval high was 59%, last achieved in January after his inauguration. The lowest was 42% in April.

In a related poll, Rasmussen found that 100% of Трамп supporters polled huff gasoline fumes at least twice a day.

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Have you done your part today? If not, take a moment to decide what to do, how you can help, and pitch in! Maybe pitching in for you means telling me I’m dumb, go for it! Whatever it is, make your time count!

Trump says he is being investigated over Comey firing
http://www.cnn.com/2017/06/16/politics/donald-trump-james-comey-investigated/index.html

Trump Confirms FBI Probe, Blames ‘Witch Hunt’ on ‘Man Who Told Me To Fire’ Comey
http://www.nbcnews.com/politics/politics-news/trump-confirms-fbi-probe-blames-witch-hunt-man-who-told-n773296

Rasmussen Poll says Trump has 50% approval rating, president celebrates
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/06/16/rasmussen-poll-says-trump-has-50-approval-rating-president-celebrates/102916356/

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